Flying was never my favorite thing, but in early 2007 I had to fly from Cleveland to Atlanta. The terminal was packed. Several different lines snaked around the wide loading areas. We were holding our belts and shoes and whatever carry-on luggage we had. We moved forward at a snail’s pace. Children cried, adults cursed, unsmiling, uniformed people walked around and scanned the crowd. The flight was disrupted by a terrorist act from six years earlier, set in motion by cowards half a world away who sent their zealots to do their bidding. This really was, as far as I am concerned, my last flight experience.

          Of course, 9/11 did far more than disrupt travel. Our lives have been changed in almost every way. We think of ourselves as being back to mostly normal from the attacks, but I think we have just become so used to the changes that the changes have become the new normal. However, the biggest change has been the least visible. We no longer have the confidence we had. We no longer feel mostly secure. We know now that terror can come to our own shores.

          It has affected us deep within our American souls.

          Some reflect on the sobering realization that it could happen here. Donna Harman tells of being at work as a church secretary and not knowing anything about it until her pastor came in and told her. They found a TV and watched as the tragedy unfolded. Her sadness at the loss of life and her feeling of disbelief that it had happened here are the things she remembers the most. Tami Overman was administering a test at the school and saw that there was a commotion in the hallway. She went to see what it was and was filled with disbelief and sadness and horror. Vi Miller talked about Greg, their youngest, who lived in an apartment complex across the street from the Pentagon. Was he safe? Was he injured? Was he…dead?

          Some shared at how it stirred other feelings. My friend from our Miami days, Noelvys Betancourt, tells of being in a grocery store that had TVs on the walls. (Miami is very different) The news came over the TV and, after the initial shock, all Noelvys wanted to do was go get her girls at school and hold them close and then go to her parent’s house and tell them that she loved them. Carol Layne and Linda Newcomb were at their respective places of work and they felt the shock and the heaviness of sorrow for others.

          And then there are other perspectives. Tanner Chamberlain says he was in second grade and was confused. How can a second grader understand? It would just be confusion. The teachers were all crying and even though the kids were confused, they understood something bad had happened. A pall settled over the children. He talks about his own son and now understands how his parents must have felt, that special fear only a parent can have for their child. He talks about how his parents explained what had happened and still sheltered them as much as they could from the horrific reality. He also mentioned that, as a fireman now, he has such great respect for those firemen who rushed into the buildings, knowing they were probably never going home again. Meanwhile, wife Sydney expressed that she was even younger than her husband and has no real recollection, but she does wish, along with Tanner, that they could remember how it was on the day after, when the whole nation was on the same page. Chrissy Chamberlain talked of being very pregnant and sitting on the floor folding socks. Fear for her children and the world they would grow up in, but also the pride in a nation that came together. And then there is a special one for me. Nicole remembers being frightened when her friend’s parents picked her up that evening and took her to a special prayer meeting at their church. There the adults broke into groups for prayer and the kids gathered with the pastor and his wife. All the kids were scared and confused, but Pastor and Mrs. Wade were calm and confident and caring, and it wasn’t so bad after that. The truth was, Pastor and Mrs. Wade had breaking hearts, but they also had a bunch of kids to care for.

          Almost everyone who responded remarked that they were disappointed with the America of today. Brian Chamberlain summed it up by saying that 20 years ago, America fought together. Now we fight each other. That is a true statement. 9/11 happened less than a year after one of the most contentious presidential elections of all time. The Supreme Court had to get involved to decide if Al Gore or George Bush had won. Feelings ran deep and strong. But on September 12, 2001, when President Bush walked into the joint gathering of Congress to address the nation, everyone in the room leaped to their feet with deafening cheers. They all tried to crowd to the center so they could reach out and just touch the President. One of the President’s worst enemies (and one of the weirdest people in the history of American politics), Dennis Kucinich, from Cleveland, grabbed the President’s hand and placed the other on his shoulder in a clear gesture of support. Yes, we were together then, and now we are not.

          But what I remember most was around 4 AM on September 12^th. I had tossed and turned all night. Filled with negative emotions, sleep would not come. Finally I got up and made a pot of coffee. I was on my second cup, standing in our living room at the window looking out to….nothing, I guess. It was then I heard a deep rumble. I was startled. What was that? I turned my head to look down the street toward the sound. It was trash day and the garbage truck had just pulled onto the street. To you, that might be nothing. But to me, I was filled with peace. The country had just suffered the worst day in our history, but life was going on. The trash was being picked up!

          We have changed over 20 years. But if we can get our personal selves together, if we can turn to the Lord in all things, we will make a difference in those around us. Then they will make a difference in those around them. And it will keep going. We are not beaten. We just need to bring the big weapon  out…..Prayer.