Senior year in high school. A classmate, Dave, and I were being recruited by various colleges for sports. Dave was a runner and I played football. Several of the colleges he was being recruited for were the same as mine, so we took a week and just visited colleges in Ohio and at Ball State in Indiana. Dave and I were both fairly new Christians. Dave eventually decided to go to a Christian college that did offer cross country and track. I was pretty locked into a particular school until one Sunday when the Lord let me know that I was changing plans. I wound up at a Christian college that didn’t offer football. Sports were a thing of the past.

         That was 1974. In 1975 I was invited to be the music and Youth leader at a little church in Tennessee, 85 miles from my school. Since October 5, 1975 I have been in the ministry.

         Practically my entire adult life. I have been bi-vocational (meaning the ministry and a regular job) for some of that time. But always the ministry. I can’t even say I have been focused on the ministry. It is just my life. I was made for this one thing. The Lord has given me a few different avenues of ministry, but always the ministry. Not a career, not a chosen field. Just my life.

         And then, two years ago, my wife stunned me with the news that she was leaving. In time I found out some of the particulars. Someone she had known before we had even met. He pursued her for seven years via Facebook and then she made her fateful decision. That is all I will say on the subject now. It isn’t a part of this story.

         I was done. I couldn’t continue in the ministry. My partner was gone. I was crushed. Those of you who were here at the time remember. I was a mess. To me it had come out of the blue. We had done our first Trunk or Treat at the end of October and she was full of plans for the next year. Then, two weeks later, boom.

         I couldn’t go on in the ministry. I gave my ninety day resignation notice to the church. I started to close myself in. That very thing that had been as constant as oxygen to me for all those years was leaving me.

         But, folks in the church wouldn’t leave it alone. I would get through it, they said. There was still lots of ministry to do, they said. The church folks expressed their love and support in many ways, especially prayer. My world had collapsed and they were offering to help me rebuild it.

         And the Lord wouldn’t leave it alone, either. For the first month I was on autopilot. Then, bit by bit, the Lord began to pierce my conscience. No, I am not done with you. Not just yet. You will stay right here and do My work. Finally, I told God that I would stay (the church allowed me to rescind my resignation) until He gave me the OK to leave. Inside I felt I was ready to go, but I just couldn’t go yet.

         It has been my experience that God will, on occasion, take a Spiritual 2X2 to my head.

         Tanner and Sydney Chamberlain (members of our church) were looking at adopting a child. It wasn’t working out well. Sam and Amanda Hann (Sam is the son of two of our members, but Sam and Amanda were members of another church) were also looking to adopt a child. My wife and I adopted our son (40 years in April! Oh my!) and I felt a deep burden for these two young couples. Even with my own personal issues going on, this was a weight on my soul. I started making some phone calls and e-mail contacts to friends around the country. One dear lady, Beatrice, in Fort Edwards, New York, told me she was glad I was still concerned for people. It wasn’t people in general, just these two couples. I mean, I still had concern, but reaching out to my network of prayer partners was something I had done a lot of before. I felt Bea didn’t quite get it, but she was getting it just fine. I was the one coming up short. The Lord was using something I felt strongly about to pull me back to the job at hand.

         Sydney got pregnant. In typical God fashion, He crossed us all up. I made the joyful calls to the prayer partners. Now we had to pray through the pregnancy. That was a good thing.

         But Sam and Amanda had a major setback. No fault of their own, but a hard thing. More phone calls, more e-mails. A friend in Ohio assured me that God would take care of it. Another friend in Arizona felt it was a matter of God’s time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know. I was the one walking you through disaster not so long ago. I want this to happen now! At this point in time, I had met Sam once and Amanda never. They didn’t go to our church. But people in far flung places were praying for them.

         In September of 2019, Sydney was due to deliver. This was exciting. But also, in September the divorce my wife was seeking was going to be complete. For that last hearing, I had to go to Cleveland. The way it was going to work out, the divorce would be on one day and the birth was on the next. I wouldn’t leave the courthouse in Cleveland until four in the afternoon. If I were going to get home that night in time for the birth the next day, I would have to drive a considerable distance in the dark, which I am no longer comfortable with. I decided I would get a room and do the drive the next day (six hours) and miss the birth. But that little flicker of the pastor flame hadn’t quite gone out. I could get home that night. I was still Syd and Tanner’s pastor and I could get home.

         And I did. Next day I got to see Syd before she went in. Radiant was the only word that fit. The family and I waited. They were all excited. I was struggling to stay awake. Word came that Clay had been delivered. It would be a little while before anyone could see them, so I decided I would come back the next day and meet the little guy. I had to get some sleep. The next day I got to see a miracle baby and I felt the nudge from God. “How could you ever walk away from this?” Which was true. As I left the hospital I was thinking that maybe, just maybe, I could do this a little longer. But there was still the issue of Amanda and Sam. That deeply grieved me.

         But then, November of 2019, word came that Sam and Amanda had adopted Ezra. I am a little fuzzy on it all, but as I understand it, they were on a list and this happened suddenly. There was a whirlwind of activity. And then there was a family of three. When I got that news, tears filled my eyes. A lump came to my throat. I was dizzy. God is so good! I sent out some e-mails. One friend said, “See, I told you God had it.” A burden was lifted from my soul.

         Two years ago I started a particular blog like this; It is, as I write this, six AM on Wednesday morning, November 14, 2018. This is, altogether, the hardest morning of my life. It was the blog that I used to tell the church what had happened with my marriage. Time has moved on. Amanda and Sam and Ezra now come to our church. Today, November 29, 2020, I was given the great joy of dedicating to the Lord, both Ezra and Clay. Our God is a God of miracles. He has placed children who should not have been, into the arms of loving parents. And He has renewed the life of an aging minister who thought it was over. Back on 11/14/2018 I was shedding tears as I wrote that blog. On 11/29/2020 I am shedding tears as I write this blog. These tears are much, much better.